Love is Torture

Oh i hate love i really do i wish that when you fall in love you can switch it off or on but you can't. I'm so hating this feeling right now I'm too good of a person to feel this way. I'm like totally in love but i try to void it like the plague i really do. Its just so inconvenient right now and i know i will only get hurt in the end. I'm always the girl that gets hurt in the end no matter what i do I could give the person the world my all and get nothing in return and that's just my life. I hate my life sometimes and the way i feel about people. I remember when i didn't have feelings for people and now i do i used to not care what people thought and now I do. Why oh why me I want to ask God sometimes why cant i get my way but i know its not meant to be. I believe that what truly hurts knowing that its not meant to be and will never be.



Signing Off Sad and Hurt :(

Losing It

Right now I feel like I'm just drifting through life with no answers. I seldom found myself lost wondering what happen to the old me where did I she go. I cant seem to connect with myself again. I'm just so used to things going my way all the time I cant seem to find any control what so ever. I wish I knew of anybody that feels the same way I'm feeling right now lost and looking for some kind of answers. The Why, What, Where and When. I just not focus right now and stating not to care I don't know if I'm depress or just in a slum I usually have allot of confidence and feel good about my life and where I'm heading now I'm just not as sure as myself like I used to be. I feel like maybe my dreams wont come true for the first time.

Thru Age Comes Change

Hello everyone today is my birthday and I have just been reflecting on some of the things that I have done in my life and the choices I have made good and bad. I have been thinking about reevaluating my life and change some things about myself will hopeful make me a better person and help my growth as an individual. I know now I can't take back the things I did in the past but as of right now I know I can change my future by making better decisions about myself. In doing so I might have to cut out certain people in my life that I love and trust but are not seen in my grand scale of things. I'm hope by doing so I could move on with my life better and more positive. Certain things have been eating away at my soul and not letting feel more like me but just shell of my former self.

Signing Off Older and Wiser

Wonderful Day

Its a pretty day outside and I just got back from church. I'm glad I went cause I feel refresh and relaxed and ready for the upcoming week. Last week was so hard for me and I kind of struggling with certain issues but I'm just going to pray about it. And wait for God to show me a sign that everything is going to be OK.


Signing Off
Reconstructing Myself

In The Mind Of Me

Well Well right now things have been so rush and crazy in my life. With meetings and all the expectations of the world on my shoulder. I know everybody has problems but I want to vent on my own right now. Its my last semester of college and so far its been close to my worst semester in college. I tyring really hard with my classes and hopefully the pay off will be great. Home life is OK right now and no boyfriend drama for ounce but in all it feels good to complain about my issues for now and then.

Signing off confused and hopeless